Sunlight

Today the sun is shining brightly, but it is so cold outside and a blustery wind is blowing. Today in my heart the sun tries to break through the blustery cold....

It is a week since my mom's beautiful funeral, if a funeral can be beautiful. I'm told the pain of grief will last, but ebb and flow within my heart as the tide. Yesterday was not a good day, but a very empty & painful one.

But in the midst of the pain, I do want to say that I'm so thankful.

I'm thankful for a friend, Garry, who was called 2 days before my mom died to pray for our family. He did not know why, but he began to pray obediently and has been praying for us since.

I'm thankful for an incredible God who spoke to my dad the morning of my mom's death and said, "today I'm taking your lovely wife to come home with me." Dad didn't want to lose her, but if God said it, he was willing to let her go.

I'm thankful for the many people from the churches around here where my siblings attend that showed their love by bringing breakfast, lunch and dinner to us for over a week. We didn't have to think about what to cook, but just needed to look in the fridge and pull out what was necessary.

I'm thankful for friends who have written such kind words of encouragement to us and who have just been there to talk and to listen when needed.

I'm thankful that my family could be here with me. That the girls were here to mourn their grandma and especially that Andy could be here to walk through this with me.

I'm thankful for my sister and brother-in-law who have given us a place to stay while we are here.

I'm thankful for the great trip I had with my mom and sister last summer and for the times my mom was able to come to Moldova.

But most of all, I'm thankful for 41 years and 2 months to know my mom. I'm thankful for the godly woman she was. I'm thankful that she taught me to pray and love Scripture. I'm thankful for her love and I'm thankful that she wasn't perfect (except in giving birthday parties!) I'm thankful for phone conversations, even when I was so many miles away and I'm thankful for rapid air travel.

Please continue to pray for us. The rough road is not over. The girls are doing well, but I know they will have moments of ebb and flow too. I know that Lauren's memories of her grandma will become distant and that will bother her. These things are normal.

Pray for Andy as he returns to Moldova on Sunday and then tries to figure out our situation with the living permit issues. This is still in the air and as we try to find out what to do, it is different from each person we talk to about it.

Pray for my family as a whole as we continue to go through my mom's things and deal with what to keep and what to save.

Thanks.